Relapse! Book Excerpt: Heroin-Living&Dying with an Addict You Love

Relapse!

The Relapse Rate of First-Time Addicts Completing Treatment is Extremely High
Be Prepared

Today’s Book Excerpt: Heroin-Living and Dying with an Addict You Love, How to Survive when Everyone Dies. Coming to bookstores April 18, 2017. Free at the Amazon Kindle Store on Opening Day!

From Chapter 12 Relapse

If your loved one is an IV user of heroin, it is highly likely that even after all the trauma and tragedy, the tear and fears, the money spent, the prayers said, the promises made, the all-star performance at rehab, that he will eventually, once more, answer the call of the former lover and succumb to the seductive net.

The lover’s voice says many things, kind and unkind—in the mind of its addicted partner. And though I have never heard the voice myself, I believe the voice is ironically subtle—at least at first. “Just once more; just one more time.”

That’s all it has to say to pique the addict’s attention. From there, if left unattended, it will fill in the remaining narrative. “Once more won’t kill you; you can do it, once more and then stop; it’s only one more time.”

As long as the addict gives the voice any consideration at all, the “once more” dialogue will continue to grow in intensity and frequency, ever reminding the addict, it is only one more time. “You and me, one more time.”

For many, it can become a never-ending dialogue that consumes the entirety of the addict’s consciousness. The base message doesn’t have to change; the focus is “one more time,” not a long-term relationship, just a one-night stand. The mind begins playing the “greatest hits” of experiences—the best highs with the best people and the best dope. The disease knows that “just once more” is the most tempting message. It is not asking for a relationship or reconciliation. It is just asking to be with the lover one more time—to part ways on a good note—on a high.
Eventually, the assault on the addict’s mind overtakes him, and he again craves his lover. Thoughts consume him until he meets his lover once more. They join, just like the old days, and regardless of the experience, it leaves him with only one final request. “Someday, maybe, one more time?”

The addict might feel guilty for his failure, for his lack of control. Maybe guilt drives him to use. Or maybe the experience wasn’t so bad; he lived and seems to have all of his recovery powers restored. But he doesn’t close the door. “Maybe, someday,” he whispers, in the back of his mind—regretting it immediately.

#heroin #overdose #relapse #livinganddying #parents